pouring down

oh Kami-sama (神~!)

why o why every time You have to entrust me to such task that requires money to solve? it's just depressing~! to pay the rental first together with the x2.5 deposit amount, which is RM1260 in total, is just too heavy for my family. why couldnt we just pay only a one month deposit? you know, i was hoping to use my savings to buy myself a new computer, and now this~! i don't want to trouble my sister anymore! everytime i see her helping me out in each and every of the my financial problems, I FELL GUILTY!!!! she has her own life to live; she has her own stuff to care, and I THOUGHT I WAS OLD ENOUGH TO DEAL WITH MY OWN STUFF! but no. every thing involves money, and go to hell with the rules of the world.

oh Kami-sama (God~!)

what did i do in my past life to deserve this? i know its no big deal for some of you guys, but IT IS A GREAT DEAL TO ME! i'm just.. just so exasperate and depressing right now. even though i'm working for money right now, but RM 500 is just enough to pay for my school's resource fee!! after that, poof! the money is gone! just like that! how come there's such super damn RICH people in LimKokWing?!! oh ya, that makes me feel kinda special because i'm the only few poor students in school. but poor people has big guts, you know that?!

oh Kami-sama.

tomorrow is year 2009 already. a new year. a fresh start. and i pray to you that please give me better fortune. please. i beg you. i really don't want to trouble my family esp my sister again. please.
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and i swear to God that i'm gona be super damn rich in the future, and marrying a billionaire. i mean it.

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.... there's a haze in front of me...